(Editor’s Note: This particular question has two responses, the first from Mikai and the second from Sal.)

Hi, this is a really great question. that many students are trying to navigate when beginning college. This is a completely normal experience. As we acquire more
information about the world around us, this curiosity is all a part of self-discovery and should be
honored. As you grow and evolve as a young adult, the new experiences, people, and
environments will give you a new perspective on life compared to what you have been taught
growing up, sometimes without context.

   Don’t place guilt upon your own curiosity. Growth requires us to challenge what we
know and become uncomfortable with ideas that once felt familiar. Two things can be true at once. You are capable of holding space for the traditions and values that you were raised with while also learning new ways of viewing situations, subjects, and ideas.

   Appreciate the ideologies and principles that your community instilled in you throughout your
childhood, while also acknowledging that those beliefs may not align with who you are today.
Moving forward, whenever you are learning new concepts and philosophies, view them as neutral. You don’t have to automatically decide a stance. The new information you are learning does not always have to be labeled as contradictory, it can be just taken in as a new piece of knowledge. As you engage with these philosophies, you can start to discern which ones are applicable to who you are as a person.

       Ultimately, you should never feel like arriving at the new version of yourself means rejecting the person that you once were. It is possible to honor the past, present, and future and allow yourself freedom to evolve. Your new discoveries do not have to be a betrayal of your
upbringing, it should be your opportunity to discover your own identity.

Hi,

You’re growing, not just physically, but mentally as well. Our parents, family, and community are our first teachers in life. The way you walk, talk, and think are all direct results of your environment and who you were surrounded by in earlier years. You learned their strengths, but may have adopted their weaknesses as well. In the future, you will naturally encounter new ideas and beliefs that challenge your past. This is evolution. Growth offers the prospect that change helps us to transform into the person we are becoming .

   Discarding how you were raised to learn new philosophies that contradict  your upbringing may make you feel like a traitor.  In order to feel less guilty you must identify the core reason you feel guilt in the first place. Yes, you are learning and processing  a new and foreign concept, but what specifically about this new way of thinking bothers you? Does it impact the way you view people back home? Does it contain a fallacy? Or does it change the way you feel about yourself?

   To learn new ideas you must become vulnerable and drop your own beliefs about reality. However, it is always important to not lose yourself in the process of searching for knowledge. In your quest, rely on your own lived experiences and personal understanding to guide you towards the truth. You may be wrong sometimes, but your opinion is still valuable and contributes to the overall lesson. Don’t let anyone tell you they’re right in what they’re saying without proving it. Not all philosophies and concepts are beneficial and could potentially do more harm than good to one’s conscience. That is why it is your responsibility to decipher the message of what you are being taught, how it makes you feel, and its consistency when being compared to your own experiences and realizations about the world.

Hope this helps,

Salvitore Shepherd